January 2011
15 posts
You got the love of a good woman, you set. (Or,...
“Don’t you got a kid?” the grocery store clerk asked of the man flipping through his wallet in front of me. “I got two kids, man!” the man replied, flipping through his wallet. “I got the one you know, and I got another one, I had when I was just a kid, 21. She be nine years old now! She almost all grown!” The clerk nodded. “Must’a been tough.”
“Yeah,” he answered decisively, then lifted his...
At least that's something.
I was walking home alone, having left an event where I met a number of attractive men, none of whom got my contact info. (The event itself my reward for braving a date with an extremely awkward okc match; ladies, just because someone has the wit to call you a scofflaw does not mean he can carry on a conversation.)
“It’s just like Sex & the City!” I heard someone say,...
How bad is the snow? Depends on where you live. →
Leo Martinez spent a backache-inducing 40 minutes on Thursday clearing 19 inches of snow from the roof and windows of his S.U.V., in the winter wonderland that was East Tremont in the Bronx. It was hard work, but it was costing him, too: He had to pay the two men helping him dig out his car $10 each.
“My baby is sick at home, and we’re trying to get her to the doctor,” Mr. Martinez, 31,...
You make good food, you get the pretty girls to...
I stood in the cafeteria line behind one of the building’s older security guards—bald with some gruff white facial hair intact, warm smile, not excessively large but still built like a man you wouldn’t want to tackle you. “What’s that?” he ask the cafeteria’s new manager, pointing to the hot trays. The manager proudly gives a tour: “These here, they are potatoes Greek style, and this is the...
Someone give me an NYC badge:
When taking out the trash yesterday morning, I accidentally dropped the plastic bag with my lunch in the recycling bin. I didn’t realize until I was on the train platform, en route to work. I briefly thought about running back (a ten minute walk, twice, in the cooooold) to get my Cooks Illustrated ultimate chili & farmers’ market cheese (you know, the kind that’s like...
Missed Connections, Snow (vol. 2)
Like one of my favorite NY Times features, here are a few more NYC Craigslist Missed Connections (words & punctuation intact) reformed as odes to the falling snow. (See the first batch here).
Ratio of Egg to Bread B’fast Sandwich Talk 1/7/11 You: Requested second egg and extra cheese in your breakfast sandwich Me: I changed my order to add a second egg and I complimented your...
Missed Connections, Snow (vol. 1)
Like one of my favorite NY Times features, here are a few NYC Craigslist Missed Connections (words & punctuation intact) reformed as odes to the falling snow. Let the snow make a thousand romances bloom, I say.
pook 1/1/11 it’s time to start our little cottage industries our tender romantic porn set-ups our arguments over groceries, and our show pony training sessions again, but the...
5:1:7?
Original Post F.H.: Quote of the day from S.Y., “Well, it’s NY, which means that for every 5 amazing women is 1 mediocre guy.” Response 15 likes, 28 comments (can you guess the gender of each commenter?), including: R.O.C.: This is AWESOME and so true!!! LOL J.B.: That may be generous… J.B.S.: And 7 fabulous gay men… C.R.S.: Lol! E.T.: Haha love it. J.R.F.: ...
Charlie
“A cup of coffee,” I said, handing him my to go cup.
“Large?” he said.
“No, medium,” I answered. “Remember? We agreed it was a medium.”
As he took my money he started talking to the security guard behind me about the cafe punch card. “Oh yeah,” I said, sliding my card across the counter, “I need to get my card punched...
120 mins english lecture needs to be interpreted →
{My friend stryker is involuntarily becoming a frequent guest poster with his astute observational skills.}
A 120 mins english lecture needs to be interpreted into paper words. its about the the graduate program. There s no professional or difficult vocabulary. I offer $70 and need it asap. Let me know if anyone is interested Best,
“It’s like, I absolutely love that about him. I love the way he finds beauty in...”
– I overheard some broad saying this while I walked down the street. I threw back my head a little and Laughed. Out. Loud.
She definitely heard me and she definitely knew what I was laughing at.
(via stryker)